its been about three months since i have written in here, would anyone like to know my new journal?  [ when i do make it, which will be here in a few. ] i miss quite a few of you! sorry for dissapearing.

He made it home last wed. , things have been a little odd.  We nearly broke up, but i finally figured out what was making him try and push me away. He found out he'll be getting deployed for 15months sometime in March, at least thats what it really looks like will happen. So with good reason, he freaked out. He finally broke down and just said " i'm afraid you'll leave me while i'm gone and move on." .. So we're doing our best to talk things out.  He's spending time with his family and friends today, and hopefully I'll see him tommorrow. He leaves for NY sunday at 6 am. I haven't had nearly enough time with him, and things are a little rough right now. But I really believe we'll make it through and be stronger for all of this. i'm scared to death of the deployment but right now i'm just trying to be strong for him so i haven't really let it sink in yet.  .. I hope all of you had a wonderful thanksgiving. i'll try to make another update soon.